In his book Dogs Never Lie About Love, Jeffrey Moussaieff Masson talks of how humans tend to judge things, and always compare the present with an idealized past. A friend admonishes him for his habit: Why do you compare one beach to another? You are here now; enjoy it for what it is?
Isnt it amazing how often we do this? Instead of really looking at and enjoying what is right in front of us, we are constantly comparing our experiences to what happened in the past, or to what we think should happen. Sometimes we even compare it to an idealized image we have in our own minds. Doing this will almost certainly guarantee that we will be disappointed, because reality will never meet our perfect expectations. Yet even knowing this we do it all the time. As Roy Blout says in his poem, people are constantly fretting about seeking bliss and perfection, instead of appreciating what they have, and appreciating life itself.
We tend to let this way of thinking affect our relationships as well. We compare our relationships to perfect TV and Hollywood-created images of perfect couples, perfect marriages, perfect families, perfect friends. Next to these images, the reality of life falls short, and what gets highlighted are the shortcomings, not the beauty of what we already have and opportunities that we can create.
douglas adams said life is wasted on the living. indeed, most of us are guilty of that; for failing to appreciate life until we are confronted with the thought of death.
dear all, do live and live well :)